Right now are Buffer Older Ladies

Right now are Buffer Older Ladies

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Last Saturday evening, I walked into the living room, where my partner was waiting for me. He searched up from the publication and smiled.

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'That blue really suits you,' he said, referring to my slinky new top. 'Mmm, you smell good, too,' he added, nuzzling into my neck and my Diptyque fragrance. He stood and walked towards me personally and gave us a hug up.

I was already glowing from two compliments in a row. Compliments, We find, happen to be constantly a excellent get started to a intimate night time.

Over dinner in a trendy London restaurant we flirted, talked about our respective children, our mothers (both still alive, but ailing), chris and horsemeat Huhne, prevented checking out bright phones and obtained a little inebriated our.

Strap-hanging on the Tube in the way back he whispered something into my ear I couldn't possibly repeat. We travelled house and Next, like plenty of of some other newlyweds on a Weekend night time, we made love. Not 50 Shades exactly, but absolutely not really for expressing.

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If we were a young couple this would sound pretty run-of-the-mill stuff. But we're not. I'm no nubile 20 or 30-something, I'm 60. My partner - he thinks of himself as my younger man - is 58.

Our relationship, coming up for five years, isn't even that new. I don't want to sound as if I'm showing off when I say my sex life is the best it has ever been, and getting better the longer we're together.

We're not talking quantity here, we're communicating quality. And it's not necessarily just between the sheets either, but all the kissing and cuddling in between when no one's looking, the smooching to Latin music in the kitchen, the foot massaging on the sofa when we watch TV, the bizarre text messaging when we are usually away from each other and should come to be focusing on our function.

It seems we are not alone. And a third of women say sex is more enjoyable than it was when they were in their youth. According to a new survey on behalf of Saga Magazine, for which 9 nearly, 000 individuals antique 50 or have been inquired about their love-making existence over, the over-50s are more sexually active than they were when a similar survey seemed to be conducted six years ago.

That certainly chimes with my own experience. When I primary played around with in my teenagers, I seemed to be extra thrilled by the concept of making love than with gender itself. For years - until I went to work on Cosmopolitan magazine - I didn't even know what an orgasm was, allow solely what one noticed like.

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Even though my body wasn't bad by anyone's standards other than my own, body confidence was a concept unknown to me quite. My system anxiety didn't stand in the way of my having sex, but it gave up on me from having great sex certainly.

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In my 20s an unhappy first marriage quickly resulted in an unsatisfied sex life. Things got rather better when I divorced at 26 after a six-year relationship and entered what I call my serially monogamous phase, experiencing very sensitive and fervent addicts between my later 20s and earlier 30s.

By the time I met my next long-term partner, I felt I was beginning to get the hang of things.

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'I don't want to sound as if We'm showing off when I say my sex life is the best it has ever been, and getting better the longer we're together'

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For the next 20 years sex went through peaks and troughs as childbirth, juggling parenting and a high-powered career as a magazine editor took its toll on my energy levels and enthusiasm. While vacations constantly perked issues up, over time it became less of a priority.

When I went through depression in my mid-40s We lost my sex drive, and by the moment My spouse and i was basically in my earlier 50s my next marriage seemed to be teetering in the edge, not helped by a sex life that had faded away.

Following separation at 55, I seemed to be in the center of my menopause when I met my spouse the next calendar year. In that small temporary moment acquired long been some so-so appointments there, but no one I was ready to take to my bed.

But in the company of a man I fancied and who was great corporation and made me laugh aloud, from getting sexually sapped by the menopause my libido considerably, several years in the doldrums, came bouncing back.

'Older women today are fitter, more fashionable and younger-looking (with or without the help of surgery) than ever'

Bearing in mind he is no more an Adonwill be than I am an Aphrodite, his complete lack of bodily hang-ups - and total acceptance of me just as I actually am, cellulite, BUSTY NUDE OLDER WOMEN scars and saggy bits - mean that in his company I have a better relationship with my body than ever before.

It could be old-age memory loss, but I believe I just've only now discovered the true joy of sex, and the life-affirming real estate of receiving and giving delight.

Perhaps it's not surprising that the over-50s are having better sex. For a start have you tried to guess a woman's age recently? Sometimes I look at a woman and reckon 48 and she turns out to be 62.

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Older women today are fitter, more fashionable and younger-looking (with or without the help of surgery) than ever. When you look good, you feel it, and that surely can possess a knock-on result on your intercourse lifestyle.

But it's not only about how women look, it's to do with the fact that far from putting their feet up, older women are learning new skills, travelling and achieving.

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If you feel vibrant out of bed, you're likely to sense electric beneath the duvet as well.

If men and women are reporting better sex lives, then the surge in divorce case among 50 and 60-somethings will be mostly to carry out with it.

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No one's going to go to the trouble of getting divorced just to play Scrabble, are they? The excitement and pleasure of getting with a person innovative often leaks over into gender.

Why Do Men Like Older Women

Some of my recently single friends are having the time of their lives sexually, but I seemed to be as well handled by the great time-saver of a friend who possesses been committed for 30 ages.

She told me: 'The sadness of empty-nest syndrome when the last of our three daughters left home quickly gave way to an intimacy we hadn't experienced since the earliest days of our marriage.

'We've been making love in different rooms of the house, having candlelit suppers - which would have seemed idiotic with the children around - and staying in bed until midday at the weekend. Parental duty possesses granted method to the independence of Saturday day cuddles with the paperwork strewn over the mattress. Bliss!'

Linda says some of her recently single friends are having the time of their lives sexually, as are those who have been married for over 30 years

My generation are more sexually experienced than our pwill bents were, and male and female 60 to 64-year-olds interviewed in the Saga survey had clocked up an average of eight sexual partners each. That's quite a lot of experience to call on.

Relationship psychologist Susan Quilliam believes that the fact we've been brought up in an era of better sex education and greater sexual freedom means we expect more.

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'An active sex life has become a sign of a good relationship rather than just an adjunct or something that over time becomes unimportant,' she says.

'People nowadays are willing to make more effort to keep their sex life going or seek counselling when things go wrong.'

Ms Quilliam also cites the improved health of older people, 'still going to dance classes or climbing mountains', together with the widespread use of Viagra and HRT, as boosting sexual relationships.

As far as movies go, the portrayal of what was meanly called 'wrinkly sex' used to be thin on the ground, but when I found Anticipation Rises previous yr, starring Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones, about a 60-ish couple who go to sex therapy to try to save their marriage, I thought an acceptance of sex in the third age - as a topic for proper discussion rather than embarrassment - had arrived.

If you are comfortable with someone in bed, for a brief time you forget your cellulite, bank and indigestion balance... and your age

And a slew of other movies and TV programmes from It's Complicated and The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel to Last Tango In Halifax and the hit novel Thursdays In The Park have recognised the libidinal urges of our most senior citizens.

It's refreshing and validating to see, in movies and on TV, people like us making out (just so long as we don't have to notice too much flesh).

But there's a flip-side to all this past-prime sexual cavorting. I know plenty of long-term marrieds who never have sex any more.

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It's not sex among older people that's taboo any more, it's not necessarily having sex, a source of sadness and shame for lots of, a resigned acceptance for others.

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'In the past, if you were together at 50 - even in a sexless marriage - the likelihood is that you would stay together for life,' says Quilliam.

'In an age where people will go off and seek sexual fulfilment at 50, 60 or 70 even, there is a realwill beation there's a danger in letting things slide.'

I know this to be true. If you are comfortable with someone in bed - and you can only be comfortable with someone you care for, realize well and trust - for a brief time you forget your cellulite, indigestion and bank balance. And, most especially, your age.